The Retardation Of Going Green

Make sure to shut off the lights when you leave the house. Don’t leave the tap running while your brush your teeth. If you leave your vehicle running thats wasteful. Make sure to recycle your batteries. They are hazardous to the environment… Thats what it all comes down to huh… The environment. After all, we only have one planet. No shit. To be honest, I wouldn’t have a problem with any of these things if I didn’t have to hear about them all the time. Why though, is everyone harping on minutiae? Its more than concern for the environment now isn’t it? They’ve all been hearing this crap so long that its become something more hasn’t it? I have a feeling a genuine concern for the well being of our planet has since morphed into scarcity mentality. Thats not really what I want to address in this post though. I just wanted to clue everyone in on some basic math regarding the “green” generation of electricity.

This rant started when I heard about a proposed 5 cent gas tax to maintain the roads. Its being stalled because of an argument that goes something like: “Hybrid car drivers buy less gas, but use the roads just as much as everyone else.” True. Why should they get to skip out on a tax just because they are willing to drive a gutless piece of crap? But the argument goes further. Much further. If you look into the process of manufacturing the batteries for hybrid cars you will find much more environmental pollution than any standard petrol guzzler. (This is the part where Obama supporters stick their fingers in their ears and say “Nah Nah Nah Nah Not Listening!) But thats not even the worst part of hybrid vehicles. They are tremendously inefficient. Now I’m not an electrical engineer, so take this with a grain of salt, but its a pretty basic rule that the energy you put into producing a “green” source of power is more than the “green” generator will produce in its entire lifetime. This holds true for the generators in hybrid vehicles. This holds true for solar panels. This holds true for wind turbines. The initial cost, combined with the cost for maintenance and repair put you at an energy deficit. Every time. How do we make up for these costs? You guessed it. The evil industries of coal and oil.

“So wait Grody, let me get this straight. We are actually mining more petroleum to fund these technologies that are supposed to save energy than if we would have just left them alone?”


“But surely there must be some energy saving going on?”

No. Its all bubkus. You know those fancy electric cars they are coming out with? Ya, those are probably the most inefficient monstrosities of all. You see, when you put electrical energy in a wire, you lose about half of it. Poof. Its gone. It dissipates in the wire. So instead of putting out half as much smog on the road as you zip along, you are producing twice as much smog at the factory. Brilliant. Don’t even get me started on bio-diesel. Your taking perfectly edible food and rendering it into foul smelling fuel at an efficiency of 1/13. Thats fucking retarded. Why don’t we just take the day off instead of wasting it on a big circle jerk every year? Hell I would rather we shipped that excess food overseas and gave it to warlords… I mean starving people.

Enough ranting. Whats the solution huh? Well we already know the answer to that question don’t we. How many times does a U.S. submarine that carries warheads around the world have to gas up? Heres my proposal. Instead of funding all these green programs millions upon millions of wasted dollars, we take that pile of money and throw it at nuclear research. Containment research. We have enough power to last us until the andromeda galaxy collides with our own, if we could just pull our heads out of our collective asses.

In the meantime. Im gonna share with you a nifty little trick to get rid of those pesky mosquitoes. Just dump used motor oil in the ditch. They can’t breed or drink or do anything if they can’t get to the water. Works every time.


One thought on “The Retardation Of Going Green

  1. Pingback: Where Did All The Normal Light Bulbs Go? | IMGrody

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